The Heat Is On
No. I’m not referring to the Heat/Spurs NBA Finals. And I’m not talking about the incessant 100 degree heat I’m experiencing as I make my way across the lower west of the US on my road trip. Though it would probably interest you that the sun is boiling my brain, from time to time. The big heat is on myself to get BOX finished. I started this book a little over 1 1/2 years ago. It’s been an audacious project and everyone has been asking when I’ll be done with it. I can only reply back, “When it’s done.”
I’ve been living in San Francisco the past 9 years. It’s the new startup mecca and everything there is about getting shit done fast and lean. The entire opposite is true of my project. This is not only a collection of short stories, but a complex puzzle and game. I have to be slow and methodical in writing it, making sure all the puzzles fit correctly. One mistake and the whole thing unravels. I’m sure I could put together something fast, but it would be sloppy and disengaging. The complexity of the project has daunted me from time to time and I’ve had to scrap a few versions to re-write it. Charlie Kaufman puts it perfectly in the video below at 2:05:
“Part of the thing that happens with writing, especially if you’re writing one piece over an extended period of time, is that you have an evolving understanding of the world and an evolving understanding of the piece.” – Charlie Kaufman
This is where I find myself. The more I work on BOX, the more I realize how much has shifted. I have the need to incorporate new ideas constantly. The process has also influenced my world view from time to time. Writing is a deeply introspective process and it makes you ask numerous questions of yourself. The more I learn, the more ideas pop-up, replacing the old ones. I know it can easily be a never-ending cycle, but it’s my process and I’m not going to force myself to change my process to suit the expectations of those around me. This is how I’ve approached all of my artistic endeavors, with great patience and care. This process has never led me astray. I will trust in this process and myself.
I hope those of you out there with your own projects do the same. People will throw advice and expectations at you from everywhere. Some of it will be sound advice, but most of it is just noise that will lead you astray. Trust yourself and believe in yourself, but make sure the part that you trust comes from the most honest place past all the bullshit you feed into your life. Otherwise, no path will lead you to completion and success. Don’t be afraid to scare yourself with brutal honesty and go with it.
Enough pontificating. Click clack type type type away. When it ends, it ends.
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